How a "stack of dates" helps to find love even for very busy people

First dates and excitement go hand in hand. First, we worry about how the meeting will go, and then about whether we will get a message or not. It can be difficult to cope with this, especially when there is already enough uncertainty and stress in life. If worries about romantic prospects are starting to affect your mental health, but you don't want to stop looking for a partner, try using a tactic called "stack dates."

What are "date stacks"

This is an approach in which you add dates to the tasks already entered in the calendar, instead of allocating an entire evening or a day off for them. The meaning of a "stack of dates" is to relieve at least some of the stress that often accompanies the search for a partner.

The idea has already gained popularity among zoomers: 51% of young boys and girls admitted The Future of Dating 2023 / Tinder that they are actively looking for ways to fit dates into their daily schedule, and 32% even went on dates during the working day. And although at first glance the idea of cramming even more meetings into the schedule does not seem too successful, the "stack of dates" is an ingenious invention.

With the usual approach, you can devote an entire evening to a single person and end up wasting time and being disappointed if nothing works out. The "Stack of dates" makes it possible to conduct faster searches among more options and go on dates without unnecessary pressure. For example, meeting for a cup of coffee at lunchtime at work or after yoga on Tuesdays. Another option is to choose a specific period of the week or month when you have more energy and less to do, and make dates one after another.

In addition, with this approach, dating is not perceived as a serious romantic test. Instead, you fill in the natural breaks during the day with short meetings, which are quite enough to understand how likeable and interesting you are to each other for longer communication. If the date from the "stack" goes well, the next one can be organized in a traditional format. And if there is no , then at least you will not waste time, effort, and sometimes money on a meaningless meeting, for which you had to rearrange the entire schedule.

What are the pros and cons of the approach

A "stack of dates" is not a universal solution. For some, it can fit perfectly into the schedule, for others it can cause stress. If you are extremely busy, but still interested in finding a partner, this approach will give you strength. And it will only take them away if you are an introvert who is quickly tired of new acquaintances, or a person who likes to act spontaneously. In any case, before applying the method in practice, it is worth studying its pros and cons.

Advantages:

• Increases the chances of success, as short dates free up time to meet with a lot of people. This means that it is statistically more likely to meet someone you want to see again.
• It helps you understand what you are really looking for in a partner, and stop dating those who do not meet your requirements.
• It eliminates the need to prepare specially, for example, to come up with an outfit for a date. It is included in the list of things that you have already set up in one way or another.
• Makes it possible to fit meetings into the schedule without breaking it.
• Develops communication skills, which makes you a more confident person and less stressed when you meet different people.
• It allows you to remain yourself, because it does not change the usual schedule. You're more likely to act naturally if you schedule a date somewhere between work, gym, and shopping.
• It keeps you from making hasty decisions, since you are considering more different options, rather than immediately fixating on the first more or less suitable one.
• Provides an easy escape route because it's easier for you to find an excuse to quickly end a bad date and leave without worrying about offending someone.
• It adds to the fun because dating can be turned into little daily adventures.

Cons:

• It can lead to dating burnout and moral exhaustion if you overdo it and use all your free time to find a partner, sacrificing the breaks that are necessary for recuperation.
• It is overloaded with information, so it is difficult for you to remember important details, and this prevents you from forming stable connections.
• It leaves less time to communicate with those you like and with whom you have found a common language, because there are other things on the schedule that require your attention.

How to use the "date stack"

First, try to explain your desires and intentions to the other person so that they don't feel like a date is just one of the items on your to‑do list. For example, like this: "I like to arrange short first dates to clarify everything before spending more time together. What do you think?" This way you will clarify what you expect from meetings and find out how much the other person is satisfied with your approach.

Secondly, feel free to set clear boundaries. The response may pleasantly surprise you, because for many, the issue of personal time is just as acute, and they will be glad to have short meetings. At least until a deeper connection is established between you. At the same time, at the beginning of each meeting, it is still worth reminding how much time you have so that the other person does not feel that you abruptly interrupted the date and does not take it personally.