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The path to a big and ambitious goal is not an easy walk, but a real marathon, during which it is easy to lose strength, motivation and self—confidence. Here are a few techniques that will help you cope with difficulties and fulfill your desires.
Some people like to think big and are guided by the motto "if to be, then to be the best". To lose 5 kilograms or write a story is too small. It's better to win a fitness bikini competition right away or get a Booker Prize. To be sure there was something to be proud of and brag about.
But this approach — to set high, almost unattainable goals — suits few people. Maybe only super-gifted and super-productive people who clearly don't need to read this article. Well, fictional film characters who win in the ring in two hours of screen time, go to Harvard or become world famous. And all this with life-affirming music.
A difficult or unattainable goal can demotivate and deprive you of strength.
Why do something, why try for a month, a year or two, if the result remains almost as far away as at the very beginning of the journey? In order not to have such thoughts, it is important to take into account a number of points when setting tasks:
1. Start with small goals. That is, with those that you will definitely be able to achieve in the foreseeable future. Not "learn English so that I am confused with a native speaker," but "raise my knowledge of the language to one level." Not "enter the Forbes list", but "create a company that will make a profit".
2. Break down long-term goals into stages. "Build muscle" sounds very vague and difficult. It is much more convenient if you have a multi-stage plan: "Check with the doctor if I can do power loads. Learn information about exercise and nutrition. Find a fitness club and a trainer, make a training program. Pick up recipes for delicious and healthy food, start going to the gym three times a week." This is one of the principles of time management: "there are elephants in pieces."
3. Adequately evaluate your resources. Let's say you want to write a book. Think about what you need for this: time, knowledge, assistants, a good laptop, and so on. Make a complete list. If you don't have something from this list, think about how to solve the problem. For example, look for a babysitter who will entertain the child twice a week while you write. Or contact an editor who will help you refine the text.
It would be great if everyone had a person who sat next to them and constantly talked: "Come on! You can do it! You're doing great!" or simply reminded: "Look, here's a photo of an Australian beach. To go there and have a good time, you need to improve your English. Don't be lazy."
The good news is that we can provide ourselves with both support and reminders.
Hang a photo of your dreams above your desktop. Write down a motivating quote in your diary. Order yourself a T-shirt or a mug with a funny phrase related to your work. In short, surround yourself with kind and cheerful reminders and update them more often. This will help keep the goal in mind, but at the same time not perceive it as a boring routine.
That's the way we are: we are not interested in doing something just like that. For every more or less difficult action, we want to get a reward. And if no one gives it away for a long time, the mood deteriorates, I want to quit all these complicated cases and go to a place where we are guaranteed to get at least some pleasure. For example, in a social network. Or to the nearest pastry shop.
All this happens because of dopamine, which you've probably heard a lot about. In short, it is a neurotransmitter that makes us feel a sense of anticipation of pleasure and thus makes Dopamine, smartphones and you: A battle for your time / Harvard Graduate School of the Arts and Sciences we strive for quick and simple joys: food, sex, YouTube videos.
The dopamine system can be deceived — come up with a reward for yourself. For example, if you go to the store after a workout and buy yourself something cute, the brain will think that sports is not such a hard task, and before the next lesson it will spur you on with a portion of dopamine. But here, of course, regularity is important. And proportionality of action and reward.
If you have chocolate bars after training, you can negate the entire effect of sports.
Think about what can please you and at the same time will not harm your health and wallet. Here are a few options for how you can reward yourself after completing a difficult task:
Someone works fine in the early morning, and someone nods at least until lunch. Some people need silence, like in a library, while others like to include music or nature sounds in the background. There are those who like paper diaries and those who have been keeping a to-do list only on the phone for many years.
There is no universal recipe for productivity. To find the right ingredients and make the right proportion, you will have to study your features properly and try to take them into account.
You can, for example, keep a mood diary: three times a day, record in a notebook how you feel and whether you have a lot of energy. And after a couple of weeks, based on these records, determine the ideal time for work, study, sports or other things. Experiment with different productivity techniques, see what is right for you.
Few people abandon a project in which only a couple of strokes remain to be done. If we go back to New Year's promises, most of us forget New Year’s resolutions last exactly this long / New York Post about them before the end of January. That is, most often people stop at the very beginning of the journey (while there is no experience, nothing is really clear, and the case does not bring any joy). Without visible results and positive feedback, it is very difficult to believe that we will cope with the task and this goal is worth the time and effort invested in it.
But when you start to succeed, it will become easier to move on.
If it is very difficult for you and you want to quit everything, promise yourself that you will wait for the first result of your labors. And then, if the first dropped kilograms, earned money or learned dance moves do not please at all, you will be able to stop with a clear conscience and choose another goal for yourself.