Olga Kleiman, a reader of Lifehacker, responded to our call and sent to the editorial office a rather unusual story about how life itself changed her. She talked about how her priorities and views on life have transformed with the advent of a child and about what a little person can teach adults.
This text is not about how I hacked life. Rather, it's about how life itself hacked and changed me.
It all started the year before last. I lived like all the ordinary residents of this big gray city. In the semi-darkness of the Moscow morning, together with the stream always hurrying somewhere, I dived into the subway, in the semi-darkness of the Moscow evening, I emerged from it together with the same stream. And this working rhythm, which has become familiar for several years: from 10 to 19 at the monitor, some meetings, negotiations, projects, bosses, the terrible word "restructuring" and new bosses. And again projects, meetings and monitor-monitor-monitor. Then the evening: it's good if at the cinema or theater, but more often at home, it's just such an evening – an hour on the way home, two hours at the stove, half an hour for dinner, then again a monitor with some movie at night ...
I was on edge several times that year. I wrote a letter of resignation and went to the boss, then changed my mind for some reason, changed my approach to work, tried to change even my boss, somehow changed the life around me. In December, I reached the finish line – I took two vacations – a week before the New Year, a week after the New Year holidays, promised myself and my boss to quit and went skiing in Austria.
But then the miracles began – suddenly I found out that I was pregnant. No, my husband and I were waiting for this moment and planned, but here, you know, Austria and all that, and I wanted a new interesting job.
But I will reveal all the cards at once – we went skiing anyway, although toxicosis in the mountains is not a very pleasant thing. And there was a lot less work after my return. After sitting in a comfortable mode until May, I went on a regular vacation, and then on maternity leave, appearing in the office only a few times to settle some legal issues.
I will not describe here everything that happens to a woman during pregnancy. There are a lot of articles on this topic. Most of them, of course, are humorous, but this is for the best, because if you worry too much about everything, it will only get worse.
I will note only a few points – firstly, the baby on the ultrasound was hiding his gender all the time and we, having heard enough from different ultrasound messages, then "girl", then "boy", stopped asking and worrying about this issue at all, so it was a surprise almost to the end. And, secondly, I am still grateful to the doctor who led my pregnancy - she tormented me so much for every extra gram and forced me to eat right, that for all the time I gained about 8 kilograms, and now I generally weigh 7 kg less than my pre–pregnancy weight, that is, I am in great shape.
But in general, let's move on to the most important thing. And the most important one in our family now, of course, is the son.
It would seem that what can a baby teach? But in these almost five months, he taught me a lot.
He taught me how to breastfeed. I am his food, I am his comfort and protection.
He taught me to appreciate every minute. I learned to go to the toilet and take a shower very quickly, clean up quickly and cook.
He taught me to use only one hand while I cook in the kitchen. And the other hand at this time can hold the baby or rattle a rattle.
What are your hands! I can only turn off the light with my head, because I have a baby in my arms. Drag toys to yourself with your feet or, for example, push a blanket away.
Oh, and by the way, the muscles on my arms have never been so expressive.
He taught me to love walking in the park near our house. I had no idea before how many alleys and interesting places there were.
He taught me to get enough sleep, and in general to fall asleep on my own, without another series or a book. Now everything is so simple, you just have to close your eyes! And what happiness it is to sleep for more than 2 hours in a row! Even after this, I feel well-rested and full of energy.
He taught me to stop and rest during the day. After all, how nice it is to lie down for half an hour next to a crumb, and then "rush into battle" again.
He taught me to be calm about stains. Yes, in the end, you never know what happened to this diaper. There is a typewriter – we wash everything!
And my son also taught me to be calm about money. Now, when I don't earn a penny at all, and the entire family budget is on my husband's shoulders, I can afford the necessary expenses, and in general, I live "here and now".
He taught me how to invent. How many songs I came up with, rocking the baby. And now the main "inventions" are toys. We have a lot of ordinary ones from the store, but most of all Ilya likes to crunch a cellophane bag. And a cellophane bag stuffed into a sock is already quite a safe and no less crunchy toy.
He taught me to understand my parents. It was only when I became a mom that I understood my mom, all her worries and joys about us, all the reasons for our relationship with her, such as they are.
He taught me to dream. To dream about how the three of us will now go skiing in Austria, about how we will show our son the sea and the Crimea, how we will go to the dacha in the summer and bask in the sun on a hammock at last!
It was thanks to my son that I had a real family. After all, a family is not just a common home and a common budget, watching movies and sitting in cafes, traveling together or even birthdays of distant relatives. Family is when you wake up in the morning and see your child's smile, family is common happiness.
In gratitude for the excellent post, we send Olga the book "The age of happiness". Send us stories that have changed you and made you better!
