We recently published a story by Yuri Balabanov, who using the principles of "ghetto workout" was able to turn from a "34-year-old fat lazy pig" into a person whose photo can be safely published on the cover of Men's Health. His work and the results naturally tore the brain, and I also became terribly interested in the diet on which Yuri was sitting. My words were heard, and in the comments Yuri painted an impressive chronology of his transformation, which we are happy to publish. In fact, the text below is so motivating that if it doesn't work on you, we don't have anything cooler.
I'll talk about the transformation process, and then about the diet. Because the process of transformation is the cause; and diet is the consequence. You can't go on a diet and start moving as a result. You can start moving, and then discover your own, unique diet. In the process of transformation, the main hitch is in the eternal BUT. A person is all made up of NO. BUT, as they say, "THE STRONG ARE LOOKING FOR OPPORTUNITIES, AND THE WEAK ARE LOOKING FOR EXCUSES."
I have already said that it all started with the fact that I saw myself in a photo. I sat down in front of this photo, grieved a little, and then took a piece of paper and mapped out my "average" day, trying to figure out in which position I spend the most time. It turned out that in a sitting position. I sit in the car on the way to work, I sit at work, I sit in the car again on the way to the bar, I sit at the bar, then, "drunk" I sit in the subway on the way home, then I sit in a chair in front of the TV, then a nap break. I get up on the alarm clock, get in the car and everything is in a vicious circle. So the first thing you need to do is force yourself to sit less.
I immediately ran into two problems. The first is the same BUT, that is, a scientific explanation of why it is not worth going out today.
It turned out that in the summer BUT only two. These are "But it's hot outside!" and "But a good movie is on TV." The second problem is the fear of starving to death. Now it's hard to imagine that for my first two-hour walk I took with me, in addition to a pack of cigarettes, a bag of sandwiches. Moreover, I was going as if on vacation — half a day passed while I was getting ready.
I had to work out the technique of going outside. I put sneakers, underpants, a T-shirt and keys in the hallway. All. No cell phones, no bags for boutiques and cigarettes, headphones with music. By the way, this is a very important moment — going outside. This should be done in an instant: undressed, put on underpants, T-shirt, sneakers, took the keys and left. For many people, the apartment door is a psychological boundary. It is very difficult to cross it. Conversations begin — to go or not to go?.. maybe later?.. maybe tomorrow… And here it is necessary — once — and you are already there.
Autumn ranks first in NO. These are: "But there's a good movie on TV", "But it's cold!", "But it's raining there!", "But it's dirty there today", "But it stinks of exhaust!" and "But there's a squall wind!" (it's very humid by the sea, and our 10 degrees are equal to one degree in the middle zone of Russia; plus the wind is creepy!). The most elegant thing is the stink: "But by the time I get to the park, I'm going to die from car exhaust." I solved this problem simply: I bought a respirator in the store. A couple of times I was stopped by the police, they asked me why I was covering my face. He replied that he was ashamed of the state of ecology in the city. However, I live in the port district... if we discard diplomacy, then simply in the ghetto. Everything is different here than in the city center.
In the fall, the exit had to be worked out anew: sneakers, sweatpants, a jacket and keys are now lying in the hallway. Once — and I'm there. "There" I make a couple of discoveries that kill almost everything, BUT. 1. My body does not get wet in the rain, my hair does not come off. 2. Running in the mud is very erotic 3. If you run fast, you can not only not freeze, but even warm up. The fourth, most important discovery is the advice given to me by an athlete running by: no runner has ever fallen ill from the cold. They get sick by sweating while running. The first thing you need to open if you start to overheat is your legs and arms, and never your throat. I will make a reservation that now I run in my underpants and in a T-shirt until the thermometer drops below plus five (not in my armpit, but on the street, of course).
In winter, BUT only three: "But a good movie on TV!", "But it's freezing and snowing!" and "But I'm sick today." The only BUT that is accepted is "I'm sick." That is, you should never, never, never run if you feel unwell. Inflammation of the heart muscle, and you're disabled for life. The most ridiculous thing is "But it's snowing there!". It turned out that snow warms in winter, especially if you strip naked and rub yourself with it. The problem in winter, as experience has shown, is not the danger of freezing, but just overheating. The first step to the street is the most difficult, and then there are no problems. So first I warm up in the apartment, then on the balcony to feel the cold, and only then once — and I'm there.
In the spring, BUT one thing — "But it's a good movie on TV." And then I discover an interesting thing: during this time I have changed — I can't sit in one place for more than an hour. An hour later, I jump up, start walking around the apartment, go out into the hallway, where my "gentleman's kit" is lying, once — and I'm there.
How I spend my time "there". I can't run continuously yet. I saw the Klitschko fight on TV and I was struck by the commentator's phrase: "Even just swinging your arms for ten rounds in a row is a huge physical load." I decided to build my exercise routine on continuous movement in conjunction with boxing lunges, rowing a swimmer and waving my arms. Then it turned out that this is the surest tactic: you train not only all the muscles, but also massage the stomach and intestines, and at the same time you will not die of boredom in the monotony of running.
Next summer I decide to diversify my repertoire and swim across one of the channels of the Elbe. There is one THING: I don't swim well. In the port I steal (borrow) a lifebuoy, I put on myself, I row. A pleasure boat sails by. Tourists were laughing like crazy! I immediately make a new discovery: being funny is not fatal. I didn't even go to the bottom when they laughed at me. And a year later I was already crossing the channel in all directions. And a year later, when I sailed along the Elbe (of course, without a lifebuoy) and met with a pleasure boat, I even got a storm of applause.
It so happened that from the very beginning there was no question about the gym. A person cannot feel at ease and at ease until he sees the horizon and the sky above his head. There is no gym — there are no protein supplements, but the question arises about sports equipment. I'm starting to take a closer look at my ghetto: containers, gantry cranes, bridges (we have twice as many of them as in Venice)... One day I am trudging, finishing the distance, and an athlete is running briskly in front of me. We run up to the Elbe Bayou, and suddenly — I even sat down on the ground from surprise! — the athlete, like an angel, takes off over the river, rises eight meters into the air, and lands on the other bank. When I came to myself, I realized: running up to the bridge, he climbed its oval arc, running up a thin metal strip. That's how I learned the word "parkour" and swore to myself that I had to do this trick at least once in my life. There is one THING: it is life-threatening. This is the second BUT that is accepted. In sports, you can't do anything that threatens your life. BUT I did it anyway. Once. There was a lot of adrenaline, but he looked like a complete idiot, as can be seen in the photo.
Two years later, I summed it up. I've lost weight, become more resilient, and my stomach is able to process any rubbish. However, I don't want any more rubbish. Cigarette smoke is unpleasant. The cafe with its regulars and tobacco smoke causes a gag reflex. I don't want to sit in a cafe and watch TV at home anymore. I want to swim across the Elbe in front of the famous DETTMER TANK barge; I want to give up the car and go to work on... roller skates or on a sports scooter; I want the ghetto district to be called fashionable. Everything came true. Damn, I didn't tell you about the diet. And was she?
